Here's your post.

I have nothing to write about. Everyone that reads this already knows everything that goes on in my life. If you don't, it doesn't matter. I'm not in a creative mood, and even if I were, I can't write worth crap. I don't have pictures to share with you. If you want to see a few new ones, check my my "space". If you don't have one, get over it. I'm not in an argumentative mood, so I won't be writing about any controversial matters. Blogs are lame.

I'm full.

what are my lines?

Help me to believe in the transformation you've made in me.
Show me the pure heart you say I have.
Show it to others through my life.
Get rid of my purple water, stained and contaminated with lies and deceit.
Make it clear again, you alone have the power to do so.
Give me my lines in this play of yours, this epic story that I'm proud to be cast in.
Choreograph my steps, but give me some freedom to stumble and learn.
I know there's been a collision, help me to believe and live it out.
Give me my lines, that's all I need.

We suck.

Last Sunday morning at CREW, Ryan spoke about the mission of "the church." He talked about the fact that we focus on the church so much, instead of the mission...when it should really be the other way around. He's so right. Without the mission, there is no church, so why are we so worried about tightening up the church, and becoming a close body of believers? Granted, that's not harmful in most circumstances, it's when that takes priority over reaching out to the lost that it really screws things up.

"But you will receive power when the Holy Spirit comes on you; and you will be my witnesses in Jerusalem, and in all Judea and Samaria, and to the ends of the earth." Acts 1.8

When did we forget about that part of this thing we call Christianity? Why is it all about us?

Remember....it's not the healthy who need a doctor, but the sick....why are we medicating those who don't need it? Our efforts could be put to much better use elsewhere.

In small group last week, we kind of did a follow up, and just went deeper into discussion about all of this. One of the questions we discussed is "Is there anyone that you would not want to bring to church?" and what most of us agreed on in regards to this is yes. It's not because we would be embarassed for said person we are bringing, but for how they might be treated. Honestly, I'm guilty of it too, maybe I'm not as upfront about it as some people are, but my first reaction, when I see someone in the church who may not look like they "belong," is to have judgemental thoughts about them.

So what do we do about this? We don't bring "these kinds" of people to the church for fear that they will feel out of place. They probably will because we have gotten so used to our little group of Christians who puts on their cute Sunday clothes and brushes their hair for church. We go through the motions.....it's all the same. We need to get the church used to people like this......there are people all around us who are not even close to looking like we do or acting like we act. Guess what, guys? THAT'S OK!!! *gasp* You mean people with facial piercings and mohawks can actually come to church? You mean a teenage girl who's pregnant is allowed in church?!

It's true, get used to it. Now, how can we bring these people in without other judgemental people ruining their first experience in a place that is supposed to be loving and accepting? I don't know, and that bothers me. Alot.

Gimme your thoughts.

Why are we so freaking lame?

Ice cream soup

He's the one I look up to, literally and figuratively...I'm pretty short.
He's the one that fights off testosterone filled boys for me in a room with cement walls and a single light bulb.
He's the one who twists my name until it's unrecognizable (Natalie>Natalus>Talus>Alus>Alice)
He's the one that is always willing to listen.
He's the one who will take part in the ridiculous language made up by my sisters and I.
He's the one who gets excited when his hair is long and he can feel it when he shakes his head.
He also gets upset when he washes it and it doesn't look as long.
He's the one that's unselfish with his time when it comes to friends.
He's the one who's laugh is explosive, and when he really gets going, his shoulders dance.
He's the one who will envelope you with his hugs.
He's the one who encourages and advises me in everything.
He's the one who keeps silly things like his "birthday" present (the glasses..."good for getting the girls")
He's the one who will have ice cream soup with you***
He's the one who will help you find good in bad.
He's the one I feel like I can call my big brother.


***I actually don't really remember exactly how this came to be, I think we agreed to get coffee when you came home from school, but you told my mom you would take me for ice cream (??) so we put the two together....

Who Understands Me but Me

I found this poem in my Lit book and for some reason I really like it.

They turn the water off, so I live without water,
they build walls higher, so I live without treetops,
they paint the windows black, so I live without sunshine,
they lock my cage, so I live without going anywhere,
they take each last tear I have, I live without tears,
they take my heart and rip it open, I live without heart,
they take my life and crush it, so I live without a future,
they say I am beastly and fiendish, so I have no friends,
they stop up each hope, so I have no passage out of hell,
they give me pain, so I live with pain,
they give me hate, so I live with my hate,
they have changed me, and I am not the same man,
they give me no shower, so I live with my smell,
they separate me from my brothers, so I live without brothers,
who understands me when I say this is beautiful?
who understands me when I say I have found other freedoms?

I cannot fly or make something appear in my hand,
I cannot make the heavens open or the earth tremble,
I can live with myself, and I am amazed at myself, my love, my beauty,
I am taken by my failures, astounded by my fears,
I am stubborn and childish,
in the midst of this wreckage of life they incurred,

I practice being myself,
and I have found parts of myself never dreamed of by me,
they were goaded out from under rocks in my heart
when the walls were built higher,
when the water was turned off and the windows painted black.
I followed these signs
like an old tracker and followed the tracks deep into myself,
followed the blood-spotted path,
deeper into dangerous regions, and found so many parts of myself,
who taught me water is not everything,
and gave me new eyes to see through walls,
and when they spoke, sunlight came out of their mouths,
and I was laughing at me with them,
wel aughed like children and made pacts to always be loyal,
who understands me when I say this is beautiful?

-Jimmy Santiago Baca

Myspace is the new blogspot.

I hate that I haven't been able to hang out with my friends for a long time.

I love that I went to that tight conference, I learned a lot.

I hate that a lot of my friends are gone, and in college.

I love that a lot of my other friends are here, even though I haven't seen them in forever.

I hate that Eli still has my sunglasses.

I love that I don't have to go to school until 12:15 every day.

I hate that my chem class is on Tuesday and Thursday nights.

I love that they record tnl and make it readily available online so I can still listen to it.

I hate that I don't have a job.

I love that I don't have a job.

I hate that I don't have money.

I love that I got into voice lessons with scary Norwegian lady.

I hate how hard it's going to be.

I love how hard it's going to be.

I hate how I've been feeling ache-y all day.

I love that I've been singing all day (I went platinum, y'know.)

I hate that everyone's in school, so that means we don't get to hang out as long on school nights.

I love that when we do hang out, we do things like karaoke revolution and gymnastics.

I hate that I haven't babysat in forever.

I love kids.

I hate that my sister took the cool curling iron that makes my hair "crunchy"....I like that one.

I love that I have my own bathroom now, it's a lot cleaner.

I hate that I'm the only child, too much attention.

I love where life is going.....I think.

Here's your dang quote.

"Look....harder"

This should be EASY.


Thanks for stopping by San Diego.

back by popular demand

Only because I got a very threatening email....
"I'm really sick of clicking on your link every day and seeing "emo-man." Please, snooky. Do something with this life of yours. end. "
....am I back.

I don't even like blogging. At all. It's stupid for me to just recount what I did today, and I don't have writing ability, not worth mentioning or posting for that matter.

Let's go over some random thoughts I'm having.

I really hate it when you are trying to turn (while driving, of course) and so you are waiting for some joker to pass by you on that street that you are waiting to turn onto....and then they end up turning into the same place you are, but don't use their blinker......

I really love eisley and coldplay.

My butt hurts.

I have laundry and packing to do tomorrow.....and I don't wanna.

I'm so freakin' excited for Mexico. The kids are gonna be so much fun, and I will find goods at the market.

I'm listening to kevin's radio broadcast right now....it's pretty silly, I've laughed more than once.

I'm a bit chilly from that 100% natural "Caribbean Mix" popsicle that I just ate, but it was good.

emo-man

http://www.dobi.nu/emo/

shoes and cars, all at once

Yesterday was the Laday's night out for Crew..and the guys, only not together. It was quite fun. Us ladays went to the thrift store and were sposed to have a "challenge" for whoever could buy the coolest outfit, but we just ended up buying real stuff.

I found these really freakin cute shoes..and I tried one of 'em on, and it fit perfectly..comfy and everything, so I buy them, right guys? Then I put the other one on in the car...and it's a freakin size bigger. So my left shoe is a nine and my right is an 8...I was thoroughly pissed. The girls assured me that you couldn't tell, so maybe I'll just wear them and one will be a little more loose. Silly silly.

But it's ok, because I have a car now! We went to an auction today and bought me a 97 Explorer sport edition, it's really nice. It has some engine (we think) problems, but even if we have to replace the whole thing, it's worth it, because we only spent 2,400 on it. It's black, I love it. http://www.edmunds.com/used/1997/ford/explorer/13613/photogallery.html?pg_type=SUV&imgsrc=%2Fpictures%2FVEHICLE%2F1997%2FFord%2F13613%2F003673-T.jpg it looks pretty much like that.

Sorry for those of you who have a myspace and have read this twice, maybe you should get a life maybe.

mmm Ewoks

"i want to buy you an ewok so it can walk around with you yup "
Would you please? I would enjoy it's company ever so much.

I have a myspace now....*Boo hiss*
Dang peer pressure again. I don't even write in this..I dunno why I got it.

I thoroughly suck at this game of life.

Thanks for stopping by San Diego.

Moore Sucks.

I just watched Farenheit 9/11, nuff said.


He's entitled to his opinion and all, but he doesn't tell the whole truth and that drives me crazy! I don't understand how people can be so stupid as to agree with him.

Woops.

I have $19.30 in unpaid library fines.

Sick and Tired....literally.

I have a cold, I threw up all night last night, cool, right? It sucks. I'm so tired and out of it.

Courtney's birthday is today 05/05/05...yay! The big 18...er something. I made her a cape, it's TAIIIIIGHT! Seriously....everyone should wear capes. Why don't we?

I've had chipotle 3 times this week and each time it's more glorious, I'm an addict.

I am supposed to be working on "my masterpiece" for art class....I haven't decided if I want to paint it or draw it....and if I do draw it, charcoal or pencil? ajlwkej;lwjefl! Give me ideas people.

I really don't know why I posted, felt like I had to, I guess. I'm gonna go die now.

I'm here.

I have not wanted to post for quite a while because...well....I'm lazy, and don't really have anything to talk about. I lead quite the boring life.

I um..I made a skirt yesterday, that's cool right? I painted three pictures this last week..one of which is Phil...which is weird, but I couldn't find anything better.

I really don't like Courtney lately. I frequently let her know that as well. She has been pmsing for like..the past year, or so it seems. I really just wanna kick her right in the ovaries...GRRR....

I saw Emily at the FT show last friday..and I hadn't seen her for like.....oh say, 8 or 9 months, so that was definitely neato. We are gonna hang out in the evening of tomorrow.

I threw up a little bit tonight, no surprise....I do it a lot. (EWW GROSS!)

I wish I didn't hate Courtney so much.

I really like Tiger Lilys, like in Peter Pan. Only I'm not really talking about the character....I originally meant the flower, but the character is neat too. If anyone feels the need to get me flowers, ever....get me some kind of lily...or orchid...NO ROSES! Roses are for pansies (pun intended)

What's this quote? Huh?! "Leave the gun. Take the cannoli."

I can hear the news downstairs, and a lady in California said she found a finger in her chili at Wendys, and now she's in jail or something.....mmm finger. (Isn't there some kind of cookie type thing called lady fingers?)

All the Cool Kids are doing it

I'm really scared of what people think of me. Most of the time, If I'm feeling confident, it doesn't bother me too much. I tell people I don't care, but I do. I think everyone does, a little.

I'm really moody, alot of people don't know that about me, a few of my really close friends, and my family. That's one of my worst traits, I can be fine around you one second, and then two minutes later, even something as small as you smacking your gum can make me want to strangle you. I have to leave the room alot when I get like that and be by myself so I dont kill someone.

I love my family, most of the time. I'm a lot like my mom which is really scary, and I dont like it alot of the times, but at other times, I'm really glad. We clash alot. She's really negative, and in everything I do, always sees the bad stuff first. Sometimes I want to yell at her and just tell her to see something good in me, for once.

My dad has a really bad temper, I got that from him. He can blow up at any given moment. At other times, he can be really sensitive and just awesome all around. He' s so funny, we do stupid things that irritate my mom and he laughs at it, til his face is red. Then my mom says "don't encourage them". But most of the time we can get her laughing too.

Sometimes I can't stand my oldest sister, Rochelle. She's really naive, it seems. Sometimes I feel like she is a lot younger than me, in certain ways. Some of the things she says just make her sound stupid, and I wan't to laugh in her face. Sometimes we get along really well and have alot of fun. She's really giving, and one of the nicest people ever. I think most of the time, when I hate her, is just because I'm so dang moody.

My sister Courtney can be my best friend, or my enemy. I guess it depends on both of our moods. She's really selfish alot of the times. She does things that hurt our whole family, and it pisses me off so much. Sometimes I want to kill her. She gets in those moods, where everything she does is just to try and make someone mad, I seriously have to hold my hands back to keep from punching her.....if I did, I know she'd just beat me up, she scares me sometimes. She is the one that, when we are both in the right mood, I can have some of the most fun ever with. Neither of us are afraid to "be young" again. We still dress up, when we clean the house, we get dressed up and put on music and dance around like elephants. When we show other people the stupid stuff we do, they dont think it's funny, but it hurts our stomachs, we are laughing so hard. I've cried myself to sleep thinking about how screwed up she is sometimes, how I wish every day with her would be a "good day".

Alot of people know this about my parents, if you ever go to "big church" you know this, because my mom speaks about it sometimes. My mom had an abortion before my parents were married. I have a big sister in heaven. Her name is Jaymie Lyanne Stone. It was an unplanned pregnancy, my parents were still in college, and they had their careers ahead of them. My mom was going to be in the opera.......but shortly after they got married, they got pregnant with my oldest sister, Rochelle, and so basically, they aborted Jaymie for nothing. My mom struggled so much with this, feeling like she was worth nothing. She was really depressed, and said she resented us because we were alive, and Jaymie wasnt. We would go to school when we were little and dictate things to our teachers like, "My mommy sleeps alot" she would get mad at us for little things. I remember when my parents told us about this, I was 9 or 10, and I didnt really understand it, I guess, I was excited because I had an older sister. Later, I got mad, because I had an older sister that I couldn't talk to, or hang out with. Rochelle and Courtney would gang up on me, and I would wish that Jaymie was alive, because I think we would have been really close. Even though I've never met her, I miss her. I used to feel bad if I forgot to think about her, for a day or whatever. I wish she were here.

I can't ever fully trust anyone, even with little things, like them telling me certain things they are gonna do, I've been hurt so many times in my life, that I question everything. This is another thing alot of people dont know about me. I hate the doubt I have in everyone, feeling like they are going to let me down. When they don't, I feel guilty for having those feelings.

I like going to church, seeing people, and hanging out. Like others say though, I do feel like there is a lot of pressure on people to be churchy. I used to fake everything in church, how I was feeling, my relationship with God, because I thought people would hate me if I didn't act that way. Now, if I don't feel it, I don't do it. It doesn't do any good.

I love singing, all the time. It makes me so happy. I love art. Painting and drawing makes me happy. I love the feeling of accomplishment that I have when I spend hours on one thing, and it turns out really cool. I have so much doubt in myself. People tell me that I'm really good at things, or give me compliments. I never believe them. That's where the negativity that I got from my mom kicks in. I don't feel like people are sincere when they compliment me on my art, or my voice, or even how my hair looks that day. I hate being such a negative person, it makes me so mad that I can't just accept everything, and be grateful.

I'm scared of what I will turn out like, the mix of my parents could be deadly, or really awesome. Depending on what I get from each of them. Turning into my own person, and growing up scares me, to death. It also excites me so much. I want to study art, and music, I'm so excited for that, I hope it happens. I am excited to go away from home, but at the same time, I'm not sure how I will do.

I'm a mommy's girl, even though I hate my mom sometimes, when I'm away from her for a really long time, I miss her.

I cry quite often, at times, I like crying, because everything feels so fresh afterwards. I don't like crying in front of people though, because I feel weak.

I love it when people play with my hair, scratch my head, rub my back, I like touchiness. I love hugs, but not the awkward side ones, or the really quick, "I'm hugging you because your arms are open, but I feel really uncomfortable, so I'm just gonna tap your back" ones. I like full contact, squeeze really hard, show 'em you love 'em hugs.

I only have a few people that I can be around for more than a day or two. Constantly being around the same person makes them annoying to me. I hate not liking my friends.

But...I love all of my friends, so much. I love how goofy everyone is. How we can sit around and say really stupid things, and laugh alot. Not the little courtesy chuckles, but ab workout laughing.

I'm addicted to dying my hair, I stopped for about 6 months, and then did it again, thanks Eli. I just put black streaks in my hair, which is really weird and crazy, and kinda not like me. I like it alot, I dont think my parents have noticed yet.

I hate not seeing my friends for extended periods of time, I feel lost. I get bored and don't know what to do.

I am at home alot, by myself, which can be nice, but so boring sometimes.

I do alot of crafty stuff, which can sound lame, but I think it's cool. I love to make stuff that other people are spending outrageous amounts of money for.

I'm really really really frugal. I hardly ever buy anything full price. I'm the clearance rack queen. I find $25 shirts ridiculous, I'd rather go spend that at the thrift store, and get 8 shirts for the price of your one.

I love summer, I love the freedom it brings, and then I get kind of bored and hot, and I long for a change. I love fall, it's the perfect weather most of the time, and I love all the trees changing color, You can look really cute in the fall. I like winter, at first, and then after about a month, I hate it. I absolutely love the first snowfall, I always go outside by myself and walk around the streets, I love being the first one to walk on fresh snow. I like to see the snow fall underneath the street lamps, it's so beautiful, it makes me happy.

I hate roadtrips with my family, and love them with my friends, that needs to happen more.

I hate riding with people in cars, I'd rather drive, if possible. I get bored just sitting there. I like heavy traffic, it's more exciting than mindless driving, down a straight road, with 5 cars. I'm kinda scared to speed, that's what happens when you get pulled over the day after you start driving. I don't like people who are wreckless drivers, it makes me so nervous to ride with them. Constantly changing lanes and going hecka fast....no thanks.

I dont really like turning up music loud, the only times I do like really really loud music, is at shows, and sometimes, in a carful of friends, witht he windows rolled down, singing at the top of our lungs. I dont see the point, really....

I love my life at times, at others I hate it, I dont like not knowing what is happening. I like the reassurance that God knows.

Well? Go on.

Eli said my blog was ugly. It was feeling self conscious. So it's changed. Happy now, EzE?

Thanks for stopping by, San Diego.

"Everyone is Stupid" - James Lee Stone

Why is everyone so stupid?
Why don't they think about things before letting them come out of their inferior little mouths?
Don't they realize that it just makes them look more idiotic?
Obviously not.I really just want to shoot everyone.
I wish there was a smart pill that I could spike all the punch with.
I hate people.

Thanks for stopping by, San Diego.

Easter?

Today is Easter, It's not my favorite one. My gramma passed away on Friday, I'm really glad I got to see her, but in a way I wish I didn't, so I could have remembered her when she was healthy and happy. We got here on Monday night and spent a few days with her, she was doing really well.....as well as can be expected, and from there, it just went down. She would try to get up by herself when we werent in the room with her, and once, did a faceplant and scraped her face on the stool. She hadnt lost her sense of humor, even in her last days. I love her. She wasn't doing well on Friday when we left, but we had to be back for church on Sunday. We told her we loved her, and she did as well as she could to tell us the same, she couldn't breathe. We left and about 2 hours later, my uncle called and said "we lost her" we turned around and headed back. Seeing her body, she looked so peaceful. It was weird, of course, but she was suffering so much, I'm actually glad she died and didnt have to go through that anymore, because she wasn't ever gonna get better. She looked like she was taking a nap, I expected her to start snoring at any second, it never happened. I had cried before we left, becaue I knew we'd never see her again, and seeing her body made me cry even more, but I was happy for the peace she was feeling. We were going through her stuff, even when she was alive. I felt horrible doing that, like a vulture, claiming things and looking through her life. It was also fun to find all her old stuff, and go through it. She has a neat history. The onlyt hing i was scared of, when I heard she was dying, was that she might not be saved. Going through her stuff, we found a certificate stating that she had done so, something along those lines. So I'm just holding on to that Baptist theory "Once saved, always saved" Ephesians 1:19 says something like that too. I feel good about it. We had given her this Jesus dvd or something for Christmas, and we found that in her dvd player, and the case underneath her bible, by her bed. That made me feel really good. I hate that she had to suffer, even though it wasn't for long, it was hard to see her struggle for every breath she took.

It kinda gets boring here, not much to do, but I don't really want to leave. At the same time, I really want to go home, and see my friends and what not. I'm pretty sure mom is gonna kinda give me this next week off, woot woot! I'm not looking forward to the drive home....my dad is going to Pheonix for work tonight, so it's just us 4 ladies....maybe I'll work on EzE's hat a bit.

Sorry that this post sucks, you guys prolly dont care about any of that, but....oh well, get over it!

I shall leave you with a quote "It looks like a big tylenol!"

-N Dawg

Thanks for stopping by, San Diego.

well? happy now?

"Well the buzz from the bees is that the leopards are in a bit of a spot. And the baboons are going ape over this. Of course, the giraffes are acting like they're above it all... The tick birds are pecking on the elephants. I told the elephants to forget it, but they can't. The cheetahs are hard up, but I always say, cheetahs never prosper..." This should be a pretty easy one, I hope....it best be easy

Quote it up

"Tubas are for fat guys with pimples." You'll never get this one, quite old school.

I just wish you could see

I just wish you guys could see what I see
How you are slowly killing yourself
It does you no good
The thrill lasts for a bit, the heartache lasts longer
Come on my side of the window and look in at it
It's pointless, don't you see?
Why do you put yourself through that?
It's as if you enjoy the pain, who would?
Yet you keep going back for more
Just give up, take a hiatus
Until you really see what it needs
What you have to give
How it works
I've been so exposed
It repels me
I see how the bad does more damage, than the good built up
Please just see it through my eyes, dont hurt anymore.

abcdefghijklmnopqrstuvwxyz

I've got the password to your heart, you've got mail, I'm here to stay.

I'm sorry, gah!

I have nothing to write about, but eli's getting upset.........let write something.....


I'm so sick of not being more
Tired of this facade
I need variety
My life is like a record, repeating itself over and over
There is no end to this madness
No finale to this suffering
I cant break out of my shell
People will know....Surprise!
I'm not who you thought I was
For years I played with a butter knife instead of taking hold of the sword
The cacoon is ripped
I'm set free
No Longer on the safe side
You'll see my true light
It grew dim before, prepare to see it blaze.....

Hahaha, I'm so lame. I based this whole thing on the butter knife line.....from eli, kinda, I changed it up a bit. Thanks, dad. You spurred stupid writing.


What have I even done lately that's worth talking about? Nothing...
I drew a picture of my mom this week, when she was a senior in H.S. Then I painted an oil picture of me and my sisters, when we were little, my first experience painting people, not the greatest, but not too bad for my first time. Last night I saw Brigadoon with my lady friend, Syd, and Hannah was there. Then we went to Toms, I just realized how we always call it "Tom's house" even if we are going with Hannah or something, at least I do. Anyways, we took Hannah home to Tom's house, and went in and said hi to the boys for a bit. Then Syd took me home and Alyssa and Megan came over and we talked and laughed and ate pizza, Then Syd left, I gave Lys her bday present...um.....we talked some more...gosh I'm lame. Then they left...thennnnnnnnn I came up here, and talked to Sydney for a bit, then I talked to Eli for a bit, then I went to bed, yay.

And here I am......you know how it is.

I shall leave you with a movie quote. (there are 2 people, obviously)

"I believe you are blushing, Mr. Big Artiste. I can't imagine Monsieur Monet blushing."
"He does landscapes."

Thanks for stopping by, San Diego.

Drawing makes me happy.

I love art. So much. I feel so happy doing it, and the sense of accomplishment after completing something neato is such a good feeling. I really hope I can go to a good art school when I'm done with HS...that's my dream...no more math for me, baby. I love being passionate about things.....absense of passion in any life would suck.

This is my latest self portrait in charcoal.
http://www.craftster.org/pictures/data/500/7977100_1958-med.JPG. Gimme some feedback. My gym teacher says that the picture that it came from doesnt look like me at all.....i dunno. This is the original. http://www.craftster.org/pictures/data/500/7977drawin_picture_half_size-med.JPG I just think i look high....

Thanks for Stopping by, San Diego

dun dun dunnnnn!!!!

I haven't written in FOREVER because well....I didnt feel like it. Syd is getting pissed, so I best do so.

Um..................My life is so freakin lame, I have nothing to write about. UGH! It seems like E-V-E-R-Y-O-N-E that I know is having relationship problems. I'm so glad I decided not to date in high school it has saved me so much dumbness and wasted time....it's REALLY hard sometimes though, geeze. Just seeing things not working out for all these people, it's like, what's the point? honestly people, if you can give me one good reason, why it's purposeful to date in highschool, I'll take it. You can't say it makes you feel good, because when you break up, there's pain that cancels it out. I dunno, it's all so silly to me.

School sucks so much, I'm so ready to be done with this year, it's SO POINTLESS! I'm going to a freakin art school, they don't care what my grade point average, or my SAT scores are...NO! If I can draw, I'm set. Geeze people....COME ON!

So what have I been doing, you ask? Let's take a journey into the life of Alice Stoner. Um.....last week, I dont even remember, school and stuff, um Friday I went to mailto:A@O show, it was lame, no offense guys, but seriously, there were not a lot of people there, but then we went to Chipotle and that made up for it. Apparently, with me, it's like playing mousetrap all year long. Right guys? I dont think I did anything on Saturday, Sunday, I had to sing at church, and had CREW n stuff, then we went bowling, and dressed up. I love Linda Ronstadt, yes? It was really fun, I'm not the best bowler ever, I got a 103 the first time and then a 63....woops, hey i really like those 3's...oooh yeah, that's smooth. (ok, so after seeing this in my blog, the 3's aren't so special, but they look neato in the font that I'm writing them in, in this part...k i'm pissed)

Then..school again, and sitting on babies and what not. Today I had school, then I came home and my parents are like..um apparently both of us are pmsing or something....it seemed like it, but they were really moody, so C and I left and went to this neato musical review with some peopel from her work. I thoroughly enjoyed it. And we sang disney songs on teh way home, like always. Tomorrow I'm going to a car auction, just to check things out, you know how it is, and then um.... mailto:um...A@O is playing after the DU game, so I'm dunna go to that. woot woot? Sunday I have to sing..again!! GAHHHHH!!! I dont think I ever stop singing, literally.

HOLY CRAP! I'm giving Eli dreadlocks, I'm so excited, I've always wanted them, but I'm too scared, but..Peru, ok, you can give em to me then, yes? EzE, don't let me down on this one, You got me worked up, you gotta follow through. It's gonna take forever, but it will be really worth it.

Um yeah, here's a quote, whatsit from? "The seaweed is always greener in somebody else's lake"

Thanks for stopping by, San Diego.

THIS'NS just for you eli!!

Ok, the last one was a joke, it was really for Phil. THIS ONE is for eli.

Um...ok. "ohh, my favorite nephew" "I'm your only nephew"

YOU GOTTA GET THIS EZE!

Thanks for stopping by, San Diego.

This'ns for you Eli

Well EzE obviously has something to prove, and I would write an entry, and just put the quote at the end, but I dont have time now, so this is a movie quote, just for you, Eli.

"According to the map we've only gone about four inches. You know I don't think we have enough gas money. " Hopefully you'll get to it before anyone else can figure it out.

Thanks for stopping by, San Diego.

Frankenstein is cool

Here's neato poem (or exerpt, rather) that Sir Philip sent to me like, a year ago, and I had written in calligraphy for my art class. I just found it, and remember how frickin awesome it is. It's from Frankenstein, the book.......can you believe it?

"She shone like a shrine-dedicated lamp in our peaceful home. Her sympahthy was ours; her soft voice, the sweet glance of her celestial eyes were ever there to bless and animate me. She was hte living spirit of love to soften and attract; I might have become sullen in my study rough through the ardour of my nature, but she ws there to subdue me to a semblence of her own gentleness"

Phil got the last quote, HA! It was Aladdin, score! Here's this'n "Pay no attention to that man behind the curtain."

Neato Gang

Wow, I feel like I havent written in a while.....I dont think I have. Anyways, yeah.....last week was sucky because the retreat was this past weekend and the week before retreats is always lame.....you just want it to be over with. So yeah, the retreat was a lot of fun, allow me to elaborate.

Ok so after "school" on friday, I'm at the church with all my gangster friends, and we are packing up stuff into the trailor and stuff, Sinney comes, looking as cute and trendy as ever, and life is neato. On the ride up there, I was stuck with mostly Sophomore boys, a few liberal girls, and Sinney bear. We listened to music, good music, that's for sure. Phantom, then Aladdin, then Grease, heck yes! I didn't do much on the way up, cept for sing, and talk to Sinney and Kevin (dubbed, taco) <------that kid is so funny I realized....holy schnikeys. Anyways, we ate at Taco Bell, and um......yeah that night, we took our stuff to our rooms. All of the girls were in one big room with a bunch of bunk beds, the lodges were pretty nice. We had a bathroom with a few showers and stalls for well, y'know. Then I think we went to the "gathering" place and A@O played stuff, and the speaker, Shelly, talked. Then I think we had family time and went to bed??I don't really remember.

Saturday, we got up and I got ready, but Sinney and Courtney took a long time, because they said we should just go to breakfast late so we dont have to wait in line for food and stuff, well we get there late, and it turns out that you sit at tables, and they serve you, so there werent enough empty chairs for us all to sit together, so Sinney and I sat with these other girls, and I dunno where everyone else went. Then, I think we prolly went to the gathering place and sang stuff and listened to stuff, and then had lunch?? We had free time that whole afternoon, they had a bunch of athletic tournaments and stuff.....which I didnt do, of course. But I did play on some of the inflatable stuff. I boxed with huge gloves, with Ryan. I, hands down, beat Sinney on the gladiator thing, undefeated, I beat Sinney on the obstacle course. Then we did the bungee run thing, and she beat me once, and I beat her once. andddddddd.......I did the bungee run with RJ, and he won both times, maybe if Phil hadn't been holding onto my cord so I couldn't run, my life would be better right now.

Ok so we all just hung out for a while, Sinney and I went to the boys' little house thing that was stocked with food and what not, they get all these special privileges because they are the band, whatever, fools. We ran out of things to do, so we just walked around and what not. There was a 60 person hot tub we coulda gotten into, but I didnt feel like it...it was too cold to have to run back to the cabins anyways. Then...................I think we did a gathering thing again, or maybe dinner first, I dont remember which. But yeah, we had a gathering, and then quiet time by ourselves, family time. I just walked down to the basketball court during family time and looked at the mountains all around me, and the stars. The sun was almost behind the mountains, it was so beautiful, I loved it. During our small group/family time, alot of the girls cried, why? different reasons, yay estrogen and what not! There was lots of crying and hugging, our eyes were poofy to say the least. After that, A@O did a show, only like, 30 people showed up, it was lame, but I totally rocked out like none other with my good friends. I had fun. After that, we hung out with the boys for a while, they told me I looked high/tired (thanks, jerks!) soo Sinney and I headed for the cabin.

On the way back, we stopped at the boys' little house thing, on the walk down, singing Moulin Rouge, what else? So yeah, Sinney wanted to get the c.d. from eli so she could learn the love song, so eli wouldn't have to sing it with me anymore (go be in love or something, guys) and then we walked back to our cabin....we went to bed, only I didnt get to sleep til kinda late, but that's ok, right guys?!?!

Sunday morning, we got up and went to gathering, they gave us a snack to tide us over til brunch, and then after gathering, we had brunch. I tried to smuggle some of the chicken enchilada stuf for ryan, but they wouldn't let me, jerks! anyways, after that, we went back to our cabins and got stuff packed up and immaculately clean. (those people are neat nazis) and then we got ready to go.

We loaded up and rode back, I tried to sleep for part of the way, but couldn't..........so we jus listened to music, and I tried to sing, but it didn't work too well because I had lost my voice. Which was kinda neato, because I dont think I've ever gotten close to fully losing it...and I was so close.....I sounded like a boy going through puberty. So yeah, we got back and unloaded and found out that Sinney's bags got left up there, so tried to call around and locate them, no luck yet. Sorry Sinney bear. So we took her home, and then I went home for a bit. Then I went to a superbowl party at Kelly's, and then I came home and went to bad after a while.

Today I got up and babysat, and went to the sister's for lunch, and came home, did a bit of school, slept for a bit, talked to my gangster friends, and watched a bit of tv while I knitted (because I'm so cool like that).........now I'm here. This is a lame post because I really dont have anything to talk about, so I just tell you guys meaningless things about my life. Neato Gang!

Ez E got the last quote (good work, dad) it was Airplane. So here's another one for the ladies....(or anyone, Ijust like saying that) "Who disturbs my slumber" this should be a really easy one.

Thanks for stopping by, San Diego.

Tonsils on fire!

K...soo yeah. Yesterday, kinda sucked, I had an insanely sore throat all day, and a big headache...it sucked. I felt like my tonsils were on fire, and my head was going to explode....but I went to bed and it was all better..not really, but my headache was gone.

So today, I had tutoring, that went pretty well, I guess. I came home, and pretended to be reading/doing school whenever my mom entered the room which I was occupying, and in between those hellish visits, I slept. I was tired, I didn't feel good, GET OFF MY BACK! Soo yeah, I didn't do a whole lot...then at 5 I went with my papa to an open house thing at Pickens Tech. That place is pretty ghetto, I'm pretty sure there were only like 4 other white people there....but I might take a cosmotology class, or just haircutting/styling there this next year. Then by the time I graduate I'll have a cosmotology lisence, and can get a job doing that while I go to college...plus it's pretty much free, sooo SCORE! So we'll see if I do that, or just go to regular ol' CCA next year, still haven't decided.

I'm excited for the weekend, the retreat! YAY! It'll be great fun. I'm excited to hang with Sinney bear all weekend. I found out that my dad is driving up there..and will be staying. I'm not especially excited about it, but the rest of the world is happy. At least people like him, I guess. It'll just be weird....and since I'm such a rebel on church retreats, and always sex it up...I cant, b/c my dad will be there, DANG IT! Anyways, that's all I've been up to, pretty much. Tomorrow is Wednesday! and then Thursday! which is the day before Friday!! Neato gang!

Sinney got the last quote, sorry E. I dont think Sinney will get this one, so here ya go. "You ever seen a grown man naked? "...well??? Go on.

Thanks for stopping by, San Diego.

My family sucks

Sooooooooo. I had a really good day today, morning CREW was pretty good, the boys played worship in big church, I always like that alot. It was nice too, because it was just them and no one else with them, although I do wish EzE would sing...GAH!. I had Chipotle, which always makes me smile, then I came home and took a two hour nap,it was amazing. I woke up JUST in time to put my hair up, and get to church for P&W practice. So we did that, and had CREW...blah blah blah. It was good fun I was soo giddy, I laughed at everything.

Then I came home.....My mom got and email from my great aunt saying that my great uncle had an affair and left her. My family is really screwed up, seriously. Most of them arent Christians, almost all of them. Believe it or not, we are the most sane and together ones out of all of us. I dont get it, why can't people just be normal?!?!?! Geeze!

So yeah, that sucks more than life itself. I'm really mad at my uncle. They are some of the most amazing people ever, So nice and just...overall good people. Despite the whole non christian thing, they are awesome. I totally didnt see it coming. They have been kinda distanced it seems, but I never expected this from him. She doesn't deserve it at all. She's been so amazing to him, and he just takes it for granted, and then pretty much just kicks her in the ovaries and says Take that, sucka! So I'm mad. But....I'm talking to friends right now, and that's what makes the world go 'round, right? I'm feeling better, but still angry.

Anyways, God is good, God is great, let us thank him for beef stew, amen. K, eli attempted to get the last quote, but you were way off young man, so I think you can probably fit a four by four in there somewhere, if that helps. Anyways, the last quote was from "The Christmas Story" I knew no one would get it..mwuahahahahaha!

This one should be REALLY easy..."He didn't fall? Inconceivable! " "You keep using that word. I do not think it means what you think it means."


DO IT!

Thanks for stopping by, San Diego.

Happy

I'm really happy right now. I had a pretty bad beginning of the week, with school, and just random crap that I didn't want to deal with, but I talked to some people, and that helped.

Last night I had small group, I'm in a new one now, and Kelly P. is our leader, it's so much better, I totally got so much more out of this one meeting, than any of the other ones we had with our previous leader. We talked about so much stuff, 2 girls cried...yeah i know, we're girls, what do you expect? But it was intense, and really cool. I'm really excited for this, and to get to know these girls. They are all really awesome. So anyways, after that, I've just been on a high. It's been nice. I've been pretty productive today, and that always makes me feel good. Last night I talked to some people, there was a big misunderstanding, we laughed.....I was in a giddy mood.

God has really been teaching me a lot lately, and it's cool. yay for that. I'm really excited for the retreat that's coming up..it's gonna be so much fun, A@O is playing, and Sinney will be there! Craig and Rhonda will be there with their new youth group too, what more can you ask for? I'll tell you, NOTHING!

I best get back to school stuff. Eli got the last quote, AGAIN! It was Office Space. You are on a roll, my friend.

Try this one....it's a toughy. "In the heat of battle, my father wove a tapestry of obsenity that as far as we know, is still hanging in space over Lake Michigan. "

Thanks for stopping by, San Diego.

Woops

Oh yeah, I forgot to say that Ez E got the last movie trivia, 101 Dalmations. For your prize, I will make you a chicken hat for your birthday, congratulations, and live a long and prosperous life.

(excuse the EXTREMELY violent language, and drug usage in this next quote)
"Look, I already told you! I deal with the goddamn customers so the engineers don't have to! I have people skills! I am good at dealing with people! Can't you understand that? WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU PEOPLE! "

Well, go on, what's it from?

Hecka Tired

Ahhh, I haven't posted in a while.....Where do I start? Ok, so the last post was on tuesday......umm..

Wednesday....I dont remember what I did until Ez E called me and asked me if I would go to Smoky's BOTB with him and Sinney. I went there, and Meg and Lys and their clan was there...we watched all these lame bands. There was a Scre(a)mo one, a Christian rock, a white rapper, and some other random ones.....*shudders* it was awful. But Eli saw Dwight, and talked to him, and that's all that matters. " I dont wanna wait....!" Yeah, arby's at target, right? mmmmm

Thursday, I dont even KNOW what I did, some friday school hw....prolly nothing cool...oh I finished Megans scarf, and made Alyssa's....yes!

Friday, school, in p.e. we are working on the physical fitness test thing....I dominated....and by that I mean I'm average, but apparently I'm really flexible, more than most.....SCORE! It was those two months of gymnastics in 2nd grade, I bet. friday night I babysat 2 sets of twins, it was insane, one set is like......7 months old, maybe?? and the others are 3, I think. It was insane! I like a good challenge, though.

Saturday, I went up with Phil and Sinney and Eli to Fort Collins for their show..we got there at like.....3? I think..and set up stuff, and I talked to Craig for a while, and we hung out "HOOPS!" and...went to eat..ughh. We found out how lame Sinney's drink preferences are ( I love you, my sweet chinchilla, that doesnt mean I have to like your drinks) and then we went back, they played their show, blah blah blah, same ol' same ol'. Then we went to Ihop with a bunch of old CREW people, it was so fun, like a big reunion. Phil and Eli and steak slept at Craig and Rhonda's and us girls stayed with Laura and Lauren, it was a good time. I totally woke up at like 4:45am though, I thought it was way later, like 8, and I was mad because no one woke me up, then I looked at my clock and it was definitely way too early for getting up kind.

Soooooooooooooooo we all woke up this morning, got ready, went to C & R's church....blah blah blah. Some of us went to Beau Jos........Phil and Danae cussed at each other, girls are the root of all evil....um...we went home after that. Eli and I pretty much just slept, and phil said weird things in the voice of joe's dad, but we didnt have the energy to laugh. I'm laughing now though, so that counts, right? So I went home, "Lady in the brown stuff, yeah!" and..........tried to take a nap, didn't happen, so I did stuff, went to crew, came home, i'm talking to people now, whatever....I'm tired and I'm going to bed! First, I have to put away the dishes.

This week is gonna be LAME..................................ahhhh!

Thanks for stopping by, San Diego.

Pain is the fuel of passion

Today, same ol' same ol'. School, knitted (I'm SOO close to being done with your scarf, megsie!) watched t.v. got online, whatever.

Last night I was reading The Purpose Driven Life. I know I know, it's one of those books that you see all the old people in church carrying around, but seriously, why aren't more young people reading it? I've had it for a while, and read it off and on, I'm only on the 12th day....yeah, pathetic. But recently I've been reading it every night. Last night, something totally stuck out to me, and I thought it was cool, so I'll share with you.

"You are as close to God as you choose to be." It's so true, I think so many times, we get frustrated, because God puts us through hard times, or we are just unmotivated in that way. So we blame him, we say, you aren't allowing me to be near you, you aren't giving me that fire. It's not God, it's our dumb human nature.

"I must choose to be honest with God." it talks about how God encourages us to be honest about our feelings, our doubts, our insecurities. I know personally, I tend to tell God, I completely trust in you, when in fact, I do have doubts, it's human nature, again (geeze...human nature SUCKS!) but seriously, who are you kidding? This is GOD we are talking about. He knows what you feel, and when you tell him it's all good, you are just lying on top of all that. God can handle it.

"I must choose to obey God in faith." It mentions how every time you trust God blindly, it deepens your relationship with him. It's so scary, but when you see how he has worked through that situation, you will be that much closer to him.

One of the things that stood out to me the most, is when it talks about how we are often challenged to do "great things" for God. Which is totally ridiculous, I mean yeah, go to Africa and help the starving children, I'm not saying that's bad. You will be recognized for what you do, but what about when you are alone on a street corner, on your way home from the drive through at Wendy's and you see a homeless guy. Are you more apt to give him some of your food, when you are a lone and no one is there, or to do it when there is a crowd, or do something else, where people will notice what you have done. I struggle with this a lot. Doing things to meet my own selfish needs. To be praised, I want people to know what I have done. In the end it doesn't matter. In the end, it's what God saw you do, and your intentions in doing so...He knows when you do something small out of true generosity. We should be trying to please him more than anyone else, so why are we like this? I don't know, perhaps we like the instant gratification that human praise brings, maybe it's something else, all I know is that we suck at life a lot of the times.

My favorite part of this chapter talks about how pain is the fuel of passion. This hit me hard. It says that "Your problems are not punishment; they are wake up calls from a loving God. God is not mad at you; he's mad about you, and he will do whatever it takes to bring you back into fellowship with him." I think we (I) tend to think that God is punishing me for being such a dumb dumb sometimes, then it makes me mad at him for making me go through it in the first place. If we think about our hard times as a wake up call, I'm sure our lives would be so much easier. Not perfect, but it definitely puts a new perspective on it. God tries so hard to get us to love him, and be close to him, we always find a way to push ourselves away, and blame him for what's happening. Why do we do that?

Anyways, sorry this was so long, that chapter just hit home with me, and gave me some insight on certain situations. You should definitely read this book, it's pretty much really good. I dont even like reading! But yeah.....

No one guessed my quote from yesterday! It's Top Gun.....I love that movie.

Here's a new one (in a whiney voice) "My paws are cold, my tail is cold" (I'm not sure if this is the EXACT quote, but if yuo knew it at all, you'd know...yeah, i like to make sense alot.)

Thanks for stopping by, San Diego.

Day o' Freedom

So today is Martin Luther Queen Junior Day, right guys? I got up and babysat, then came home, fell asleep watching some move from the 80's with Julia Roberts, or something. then I did some math, and yeah, did nothing for the rest of the day until 7:45 when I saw the movie Alexander with my sister and my dad. DONT SEE IT! Gay scenes, curled beards, and to top it off, Alexander's gentleman lover was REALLY HOTT! He had pretty eyes, I'm gonna be straightforward with you. I was thoroughly attracted to him........Anyways, the movie SUCKED! Alexander is gay (literally) and stupid and prideful, and the only cool part of the move (his pretty homo friend) died! AND it was insanely long! 3 hours. I guess it's not THAT long, but for a really lame movie, it's an eternity.

So I came home, thank God, and now I'm talking to some people.........that is the extent of my day. I'm really tired.....

My sweet, dear, little chinchilla got the last movie quote right. It was Grease, indeed. I'm pretty sure she wont know this one though, soo someone else should know it...go on! KNOW IT!
"Jester's dead. Yee Haw! "

Thanks for stopping by, San Diego.

I'm finally home

I've been gone ALL day, cept for when I came home to change at 4:30....
I got up at 8 and got ready for church, went to church, then went to CREW......after that, I went to chipotle with some people, and then went to Rochelles for a bit.

Leah and Danae and I went to the mall to exchange stuff, then we came back to Rochelles...and watched a movie. I had to be at the church at 4:30 to practice b/c I had to sing tonight. Sooo after the movie, I go home for like, 2 seconds, and changed, and then go to the church, and I'm late of course, but who cares, really? We practiced, and it was actually sorta cool, b/c we had a sax......weird, but I liked it. Then we had CREW, it was different, we had stations where people could write, or journal, or do whatever, during worship, if they felt that was how they wanted to worship God, nobody really did anything though, cept for stay up front and sing.

Afterwards, we all painted, and made necklaces and bracelets and what not, it was weird, I liked it. A bunch of guys played X-box, go figure. I would have played, but everyone always yells at me because I just spin around in circles and shoot my gun off.......whatever. Sooooo after CREW, we planned to go to VI, so I went with Dusty, and we waited for a good 10 minutes and finally got a hold of Jon...where are they? Old Chicago..yeah, and there is no room for us, go figure. So then I finally got a hold of Megan, and she and Alyssa and their friend went to Baskin Robbins, so we went there with them, and ate yummy stuff, and yeah......now I'm home.

Today was cool at church, I actually got a lot out of the lessons. I made a point not to sit by someone who would distract me, and I totally just listened, and made notes. It was cool, I haven't done that in a long time, I'm always distracted by other people, or just not in the mood to be "churchy" and I fake it. This actually made it go by a lot faster, too. SCORE! so yeah, it's been a good day, I'm definitely tired though..I've got stuff to do..so yeah.

I was thirsty, so I went downstairs and got some water.....and put it on the desk, and now my cat's are drinking it...dang it!

and there it goes, they just knocked it off the desk. At least it wasn't grape juice? that stains, right guys?

Since no one guessed the first movie quote, I'll tell ya, it was Ever After...suckas!

Try this one...."She looks too pure to be pink"

Thanks for stopping by, San Diego.

I'll miss you, Schnookie.

I was just talking to Meggie, my sweet little Schnookums, and we were talking about college and stuff......Holy crap, that is gonna suck. When this set of seniors graduates and they all move away to college....Megan, Phil, Courtney......I dont know what I'm gonna do. It'll be like 8th grade all over again, not exactly, but, close enough. I think I've been in denial about this whole thing. I just realized how much time I need to spend with all these people before they leave. High school is sooo long, but seems soo short at times. AHH! Pretty much, what I'm saying, is you should all stay in-state....because, well, I dus like you, ok?

Thanks for stopping by, San Diego.

Bad posture

So today, I woke up, cleaned my room a bit more, vacuumed, made some pretty bead things.....watched The Score, and then had lunch. It was yummy. Um....then I got online for a bit, and knitted, and got online. Then I felt like I needed to make something, so I sewed a purse right up, it's quite cute if I do say so myself. annnnnd, yeah, Courtney made an apple pie, so I ate some of that...mmmmm good. and now I'm here.

I've been really happy lately, I like it. I don't even know what it is. Finding new sides of old friends, making new friends, just hanging out a lot. Good times. I like life right now. I'm excited for the retreat, to just be able to hang out with friends nonstop for a few days. I love that, most of my favorite memories are on retreats.

I think I have bad posture.....or something, My back hurts. I should stop sucking so much. Well, that was another boring blog entry for you to read...YES!!!!!!!sssssssssssssssssssss

"Forgive me, Your Highness, I didn't see you"....................."a servant girl, with quite a good arm, actually" Name the movie that those 2 quotes came from.....

Thanks for stopping by, San Diego.

ummmm yeah

Sooo today, has been a tiring day. I think it's just because I haven't gone to sleep any earlier than 1:30 for the past week.....I dunno. I dont even know what I do until then....I'm usually on here, talking to Ez E about art, or Sydney about how cool we are, or Phil about random stuff........and then I go into my room and remember all this crap I wanna do before bed...and then I read my bible, and then um...go to sleep. I should start my bedtime routine earlier.

Today I had Friday school. First period, Gym. We played basketball, actually we just worked on shooting and played knockout n stuff. I seriously, don't know how to play basketball (i mean, i"m really good guys) but seriously, no. So I go up there, and look up towards heaven at the gazillion ft. tall hoop, and I tell my teacher, I'm never gonna make it in. And guess what I do? make it in, 5 times in a row..how? i dont know. I was brilliant today.........I cant shoot under pressure though, I gotta take my time.

Mkay, so then I have voice class...blah blah blah, same ol same ol, I know everything she's telling us..whatever.

Then..lunch..score!

Then art, I just showed him the posters I made, and we talked about barbies and sang phantom of the opera.

Spanish, I drew while I was supposed to be saying words like "tiene" or "cuarta" I dont even know what spanish is....?? I have learned nothing in that class all year. So I just drew during it....I was going to draw a pot of flowers, so I drew the pot, and then I looked at my hand, and it looked really cool, so I drew a plant growing out of the pot with vines wrapping around it, I think it's cool. Everyone else thinks I'm disturbed, whatever fools.

I came home, and knitted a bit...SHUTUP I'M AWESOME! and..took a nap for like 20 minutes...and then had dinner.

My sister and I were so freaking giddy at dinner, I laughed at everything, and it was a deep belly laugh that makes you feel like you just did a gazillion sit ups. Then we sat under the table..I dunno, it was funny at the time. Then my parents went to a movie, and Court and I had to clean up crap, so what do you have to do to clean up? dress up like princesses! So i put on my favorite pink dress...when you spin around really fast and then sit down, it makes a huge circle....it's old time-y, i love it. We turned on The Phantom soundtrack really loud, and cleaned.

After that, Court and I met Rochelle at VI......and we ate stuff. Then we went to Chelle's work and played pool, and Tekkin.....then I came home...my day in a nutshell.

I'm gonna go read my bible and go to bed. I haven't been reading my bible very often, I finally just started doing it every night again....ahh I'm bad. It sucks to be like this....bible here I come.

Thanks for stopping by, San Diego.

SCORE!

We just got the Phantom of the Opera soundtrack in the mail, and well I'm excited enough to devote a whole blog entry to it, sooooo what does that tell you?

Good times

So last night, I talked to Ez E about art for quite a while, it was ever so much fun. None of my other friends like to talk about that. So score, another point for him! (basketball, right guys?) He pretty much made me be in love with Salvador Dali......o my gosh, seriously guys. I was always kinda intrigued by his work, but never really looked at it so closely. He's freaking amazing, very inspiring indeed. AHH!

I'm so excited to get done with highschool. I'll be able to go to college and study just art and/or music...instead of all this other junk that pisses me off so much. AHH! I get more excited as I think about it. Actually having to spend all of your time on something you love...woohoo!

Today, school, actually I didnt do very much important school, I worked on the posters I was supposed to design for Friday school, and did a bit of math, but not a lot else.....hmm. I don't even know what to write, this day was so blah.

I found this freaking amazing hat that I decided only Ez E would dare wear. So someday I'll make it for you dad, someday *looks out window, longingly* I'll show you a picture later......I'm in love with it.

I decided that Syd is one of my favorite people, we each get a million points? for our lives? I dunno, but Sydney, if you are out there, wherever you are, you better come on the retreat. Or, like I mentioned to Ez E. "all my hopes and dreams would be thrown right into the dumpster, with all the fish, and old couches, filled with loose pocket change" It makes you want to cry a bit, no?

Some lady is at my house now....and she has a really annoying voice, I don't dare go downstairs and see who it is.

Well I'm off to knit for my favorite Schnookums.......working on the other half of her Christmas present..SHUTUP!

Thanks for stopping by, San Diego.

White days

So it snowed last night, or this morning, or something, I don't even know. I'm getting tired of snow! It's so white, and bright, and cold and damp, untill it gets dirty then it's just dirty and cold and damp slushy grossness. plus, my hands are always cold in the snowy winter.

Yesterday didn't change much, I got online last night and talked to people for a while, about dumb issues and what not, and how cool certain people are.

I got up today, and was going to babysit at 9, then the lady called at like 8:30 and cancelled, thank God, their kids are boring and they don't pay crap. So I did some school, and I looked online at colleges I might want to consider......maybe an art institute? Or DU, for music and art?From what I've heard, they are well covered in those categories (of course my mom told me that, and it's been 20 years since she was there, so things may have changed). Then did mor school, until my mom left, then I watched a movie with my sis, while I worked on my art project for Friday school. And um.....yeah then we got some food for dinner, and now I'm here. Boring day, again. What can I say?

If anything cool happens, maybe I'll post tonight, but don't count on it.

Thanks for stopping by, San Diego.

High D, heck yes.

Soooo today was ok, got up, did some school, went to tutoring, that only took half an hour, because apparently, I'm brilliant. Then I came home, and was talking about The Phantom with my mom, and she was telling me how she sang some of those songs when she was a singing waitress, so we came home and looked for her sheet music. I found it, then, just for fun, we played through it, and I made her sing it, it was ever so pretty.

I found out that I can hit a high d, not completely perfect and strong, but I'll work on that, with all those high d's I sing all the time, y'know guys. That's insane though, soprano voices kind of sound like screaming when they get up that high. Sooo yeah, did some school, ate lunch, then I babysat. and now I'm home, writing in my blog. I don't know what I'm doing tonight, prolly just gonna stay home and sing d's all night....yeah, cool, right guys?

Well I'm off to study and what not.

Thanks for stopping by, San Diego.

Yeah...

Soo....I did some more math, and watched the Critics Choice Awards.
The girl who plays Christine in The Phantom of the Opera, was only 16 when she was cast, that's my age! She's amazing. I pretty much like her a whole lot. She won Best Young Actress or something.....yesssssssssss.

I'm wasting my time on here instead of finishing hw....I really dont wanna. Awww hell, might as well just get it over with.

Thanks for stopping by, San Diego.

Unproductive Day

I had a lot of fun in Fort Collins yesterday, we just hung out a lot and got to see friends, it was nice. It was good to be away from home for a day. We ate gross food and played name that movie.......yeah, good times.

I haven't done anything I'm supposed to today, this sucks. My mom woke me up around 7:30, adne when she left for work at 7:45, I went back to bed. I slept til 9:45.......then I got up....got online for a bit, ate some cereal, did a little bit of math....got online again, watched t.v. Then my sister woke up, we went to Taco Bell, and then because of the name that movie thing last night, I really wanted to watch The Lion King, so I did. My mom came home and ate with us and watched the movie.

I got online for a while, talked on the phone a bit, did some art history, checked email.....blah blah blah...then I did more math. Then I played Tekkin with Court, did some more math. Then I got a bad case of nostalgia, and popped out the videos of my voice class performances/musicals/plays, from the last few years..........that took a while.

Out of all the random crap that I've done today, and the many times I have sat down to do my math, you'd think I'd have a lot done, but I only got 2 sections done.....UGH! I need to get 5 more done before tutoring at 10:30 tomorrow morning, yeah, I'm screwed. I could just sit down and do it all, but I really dont wanna.

I spend too much time on the computer with schoolwork, and just random stuff. Lately, when I do something wrong, like....just now, I started to peel off my henna tattoo (lol...yeah) and it's only been on for an hour....needs to stay on for 6 hours, but when I did that, in my mind i said, "Edit, undo" Oh my gosh, that is so lame. God save me, and the queen while you're at it.

I really need to go get my junk done. Maybe I'll make a list, I like to cross things off.......back to the books. Thanks for stopping by, San Diego.

My name is Natalie, and I'm addicted to hair dye

Ok.....so, someone........you know who you are.....convinced me to dye my hair again last tuesday...I hadn't dyed it in *counts on fingers* 9 months!!! and then, I go from blonde to dark brown...just like that. Whammy! Ughh, gross, I hate that saying. Anyways, a baby could have been conceived and born in the time that I hadnt dyed my hair, that's quite an achievement. But I was weak. Once again, I caved into peer pressure, I GOTTA stop doin that! So, Tuesday, me and some other kids had a hair dye-ing party. That made my sisters and another friend and her husband want to dye their hair, so guess what I did today? Dyed 4 other peoples hair....I'm a bad influence. I used some of the leftover red, and put some chunkies in mine, I look punk-ish. I dont want to. I've never done anything so un natural looking, it's totally unlike me. Oh well. Gosh, I'm writing a lot about my hair. You can tell someone is lame when they can take up a whole blog entry on how they dyed their hair. GAH!

Tomorrow, going to some friends' show........that'll be fun, haven't heard them play in a while. I'm the merch girl, people actually come up to me now at their shows, and call me the merch girl. At least I have some kind of status in this evil world.

I literally, did nothing today, until I went to my friends and dyed everyone and their mom's hair. I just sat around, got online for a while, knitted (heck yes, I knit) and watched part of The Elephant Man ( I feel bad for him). What is it lately with me and movies with people that have deformities in them. First, Phantom, now this......interesting.

I'm off to bed, I have nothing to write about in this thing.

Thanks for stopping by, San Diego.

A bad taste in my mouth

I just woke up at like, 10, I never sleep in that late, it feels weird, I like it. I still haven't brushed my teeth and I have that nasty stale taste in my mouth. I saw White Noise last night, I was already doubting it, but it seemed like both of my parents were pmsing last night, so I just wanted to get out of the house. Yeah, my suspicions were right, it was dumb. It could have been so much better too, which makes me mad. I hate it when that happens. People screamed alot, and I laughed a lot. I mean, pigeons, right guys? It was kind of intriguing, but...not enough to be amazing. So, to sum it all up, it pretty much sucked. Well, I'm off to brush my teeth. Thanks for stopping by, San Diego.

12 year old politicians

I just thought of something dumb that happened today. Ok, so I'm homeschooled, and I go on fridays to a "program" dubbed, what else? Friday school. Anyways, you go on Fridays and take classes that you can't take at home, or that you're parents are too stupid to teach you at home, or just to get out of the house for at least one whole day. Anyways, I'm sitting in my Spanish class (do I know any spanish? no. this class sucks) And keep in mind my WHOLE class is in middle school!!!! I'm the only high schooler in there, the other oldest kid in there is like, 13....ughhh. Anyways, there are these 2 twins from Texas, they are so dumb.

They think they pretty much know everything. We got into a debate, during Spanish class about politics, for a good 45 minutes. Let me rehash what these dumb girls said. Twin # 1 Will be this periwinkle blueish ( I dont even know if this is periwinkle??) twin # 2 will be red and i'll just be black
I dont even know how we got on the topic of politics, but whatever..


"Oh my god, I HATE Bush!"
"Why?"
"Because he's stupid"
"Oh, great, and why else?"
"He has bad grammar!"
"Are you serious? That's why you hate him? First of all, his grammar isn't that bad, second of all, WHO CARES?!?! If our president's worst trait is that he has bad grammar, I'd say we're doing pretty good"
"Well, if you are going to be in politics, you need to have good grammar so you can give speeches and stuff"
"Is that the ONLY reason you hate him? Give me one GOOD reason you dont like him"
"Oh don't even get me started on that!"
"Ok, I don't really mind that he has bad grammar, but what REALLY makes me mad, is that Sandra Bullock gave a million dollars to the Tsunami Victims, and Bush only gave ten thousand, I mean, he's the president, he has a lot of money"
"Holy Crap, are you kidding me? a) Sandra Bullock is an actress, I'm sure she has lot's more money than Bush, b) The President really doesn't get paid a whole lot, yeah he gets to live in the White house and blah blah blah, but they dont pay him jack, not a lot compared to what you might think"
"Whatever"
"Ok, so the only reason you hate Bush is because he has bad grammar and only gave ten thousand dollars to Tsunami? You gotta give me something better than this"
"Well, what about Iraq? And all of those innocent people dying"
"Have you actually talked to someone from Iraq? a majority of them are happy that we are over there, because it is helping them, yeah, some people are dying, but, war is inevitable, so is death, get over it, pray for them or something"
"Whatever, all I know is they didnt do anything, and he just goes over there and starts to kill people, I wish they would let kid's vote"
"Seriously? Are you kidding me? What good would that do?"
"Well, we should have a say in the person who runs our country, I mean, it affects our schools"
"Ok, and how old do you think you should have to be to vote?"
"well, prolly around 13"
"Ha, that would do a lot of good, most 13 yr olds dont even know who Bush is, yet alone, why they should vote for or against him. They aren't responsible enough to make a decision like that"
"well, I've written papers on politics and stuff, so I know what I'm talking about"
"Well, If a thirteen year old said they had been in a sex ed and parenting class, would you think they'd be responsible enough to go off and have sex and get married, and have kids and what not?"
"no"
"and in the same way, 13 year olds shouldn't have the right to make huge decisions for their country, because they arent responsible enough"
"Whatever, I hate Bush, that's all I know"
"Are those seriously the only reasons you have for hating Bush? tell me why else"
"Oh, don't even get me started on that" (every time after this, that I would ask her that question, she would say the same thing, which we all know is code for"I dont know anything about politics, I just heard my parents talk about them at the dinner table. Those two reasons are the only ones I had, and they just went to crap. "


At this point, our teacher interrupted and made us do Spanish, I left out a bunch of stuff, and there were lots of people talking at once, so yeah, but this is the gist of it.....Man, they piss me off.

I really dont know why I stooped that low to argue with a 12 year old about politics, but seriously, she made me mad, she had no clue what she was talking about. Plus, I didn't want to do Spanish..... Thanks for stopping by, San Diego.

Am I a cool kid now?

Mmmmkay. Well, I have a few friends who have blogs, and what do these people do? Pressure me to get one. Do I cave in? Yes. Peer pressure guys, come on. Am I a cool kid now? I don't even know if I will write in this very often. We'll see, I guess. Only time can tell. Holy Poop, Batman!

So, yesterday, at approximately 10:05, I saw The Phantom of the Opera, and it pretty much, was amazing. Seriously, I loved it, a lot. Christine is really pretty, I like her hair, and her clothes, although sometimes they are a bit scandalous. Oh yeah, and she can sing. I love that in a woman...I mean.....I'M STRAIGHT! That made me want to be in a musical again, or just sing a lot. I need that soundtrack. That would be so freakin fun to be in the Opera, my mom almost was, but guess what happened? My sister, that's right, way to go, idiot. No singing for you, mom. Anyways, the Phantom is intriguingly scary. In a way, I hate him for ruining everything, I mean, did you see that chandalier? But at the same time, I feel bad for him, and have compassion. But I think he just kind of pisses me off more than anything, he's really confusing. I hate that Christine lets him control her...I just want to drop kick her, but she's really pretty, so it's ok, I guess.

Tonight I'm gonna go see The White Noise (I think that's what it's called) with some people....I'm kind of skeptical about this one, we'll see. sooooooooooo....Thanks for dropping by, San Diego.